Shalom, this is the story:
If my child died I would want to cry my eyes out I don't think I would. Sociopaths don't form normal emotional attachments to other people. They lack empathy. When they see a person suffering they don't feel bad over it.
I was in highschool biology when evolutionary theory was really laid out for us. Species developed new characteristics, new traits and then those can actually eventually take over. So I concluded that maybe I had reached a higher stage of humanity where I wasn't held back by emotions the way other people were. And so I came to regard all these little rules that people tell you to follow as kind of brainwashing me, breaking into places and you know breaking into the school or stealing things.
I felt like I was stripping away these layers of rules that people had been imposing on me my entire life and it was a it was an amazing feeling. And if I really wanted to to sort of be free of everything I've been I've been brainwashed into thinking about right and wrong and I decided to kill my dad.
And I decided to do it in a brutal fashion not a not a gun shot or anything I was going to do with a hammer. When I walked up to my dad I've got a hammer in my hand and I hit him in the head seven or eight times with a ball-peen hammer and so I thought he was dead. I just left.
One of his friends Jim found him covered in blood took him to a hospital. And so I went told my mom hey I may have done this because I think I'm being told. On at that moment instead of taking me to the police or anything she took me to a psychiatric hospital.
They made a report based on the time that I was there and it's an antisocial personality assort. Eventually Virginia had them removing from the psychiatric hospital and take me to jail. Since my dad survived I was convicted of malicious wounding. I was sentenced to ten years in prison.
There was a Christian named Randy and he was a bit different from everyone else. One day he was reading his Bible and I walked up to him and I said, "Hey you know why you're reading your Bible ? You're reading the Bible because you're born in the United States. If you've been born in China you'd be a Buddhist. If you've been born in India you'd be a Hindu. If you've been born in Saudi Arabia you'd be a Muslim. People like you believe whatever you're taught to believe."
He started arguing with me and started tearing me to pieces and that was very different from other Christians that I'd argued with in the past ended up in for a couple of months a series of arguments with Randy about Christianity versus my worldview. Randy was winning the arguments that we would get into. I'm not going to beat him this way. I'm gonna have to really learn the Bible so that I can respond to him. I regarded that as my weakness.
I have to say I was impressed with Jesus. I went from thinking that I'm the best person in the world of thinking that I'm the worst person in the world. The question came up either I'm stuck like this or there's someone out there who can deal with this. Who out of anyone had the ability to change, radically change, severely messed up people. It's Jesus or it's nothing. It's Jesus or there's just no hope. I bowed down and I prayed and I said, "God I don't know if I'm going to believe in you tomorrow. But I believe in you right now if you can do anything with me. You're welcome to it."
And I ran through the sort of sinner's prayer that I'd heard there in the jail. When I sat up the whole world looked different. It looked like I was in a different place. Like everything was a different color and I didn't know if this was you know there's something weird going on but it was uh I didn't want to hurt anyone at that point. Some amazing calm I felt like I've been physically non-stop brawling all my life and that I finally could just sit down and rest.
While I was in prison I thought it would be bad to actually confess because my dad again had no recollection. I'm a Christian now I can't spend my entire life saying I haven't done something that I've done. I'm gonna write a letter to my dad right now and lay everything out to him. He came to see me at the first chance and I said it's okay and he forgives me and he told me he said he said I really didn't think you did it. And so for him to hear all of that at once and then to forgive me it's a it's amazing stuff.
Between jail and prison I was locked up for a little over five years. I got out of prison in 2000 and started college immediately. Started arguing with a young woman who was an agnostic and she eventually became a Christian. And we were married the following year. We have kids and you know getting to watch them grow up and given the things I've done I should not be able to have this sort of this sort of normal life. It kind of blows me away.
Source:
Psychopathic Atheist Embrace Jesus | David Wood.
I want people out there to know that there is a Creator to this world. That there is a point to this world that other people are important that it's not just all about you.
Jesus rose from the dead and that shows that there is a point to everything. That there is a creator that He does care about us. And that He entered this world to die for us and that is a message that matters because it changes everything.
- Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me. - (John 14:6).
Post A Comment:
0 comments: